Child and Youth Ministry Casserole: Essential Ingredient #1

Meat, potatoes and pasta: these are my favourite parts of anything I eat. Many people know that I’m a carboholic. At a buffet, I’m eating the potato and macaroni salad, macaroni and cheese, pasta and any kind of potato going – mashed, fried, scalloped, wedged, roasted. You name it and I love it! I truly believe that you can never have too much of these comfort foods, even if my waistline disagrees with me.

In the same way, you can never have too much of the congregation actively supporting and embracing ministry with children and youth. This is not one of those tasks that those other people are better at, or that the younger ones should be responsible for, or that the minister and staff should head up. No, welcome of anyone is shared by the whole body of Christ. We don’t want to overwhelm people, but everyone’s words and actions should communicate genuine care and interest and hospitality. One bad experience and we may never see a family in need of our faith community again.

So, what does incorporation of this first ingredient look like?
It looks like a willingness to make room by:

- having ushers and greeters informed about who leads your children’s and youth ministry where and when and able to assist and direct new people

- letting someone new to sit in the spot you usually take instead of embarrassing them by asking them to move

- recognizing that most children make noise and are learning about what it means to be in God’s house, and that parents are often learning or re-learning this too and need support and encouragement

- living a theology of Christian community that is inclusive of all ages, recognizing that all of us are made in God’s image and are part of the body of Christ, and therefore essential to its health

- being encouraged to find ways to make connections with children and youth who sit nearby, asking them how their week has gone, how school or work is going and really listening to the answers to show their importance

- learning the names of the children, youth and their parents and using them when you see them and in prayer

- inviting the participation of children and youth in various groups and activities, such as Christmas caroling and the bazaar, so they can make connections with others

This is a short list, and I’m sure that you can think of many other ideas. All of these are possible for the entire congregation to do in some way and enable us to keep the vows made at baptism to commit to the faith nurture of the children in our midst.

However, the key is actually embracing the vision of inclusion and valuing children and youth and their families, whether new to the church or not so new. It may mean overcoming frustration with someone’s parenting style and instead exhibiting grace and encouragement. It may mean acknowledging that struggles with the church in general can’t be scapegoated onto these families (i.e. “we can’t afford to spend money on these people and their programs – we can barely pay the bills as it is”). It may mean kicking some attitudes of entitlement and maintaining old ways to the curb in order to see who God is calling into the fold to undergird new life and witness. It may mean recognizing that these people may not be with us for long and are not necessarily going to contribute a lot financially or as volunteers. It may mean letting go and trusting that God is moving and that none of us have control of the Spirit’s movement. It may mean overcoming feelings of guilt or fear or anxiety and instead embracing the new thing that God is doing in our midst.

So, how is your congregation doing with the first essential ingredient? Where may God be calling on you to bend a little, to respond in obedience to those needing your support and care? Pray about this and see what happens and may God bless the results.