Moving towards Reconciliation

Last Sunday was Healing and Reconciliation Sunday in my denomination. I felt that I had to really dive into it, particularly to address the need for reconciliation with our indigenous brothers and sisters, but also to lift up reconciliation between us and God, and between us and anyone who we have hurt or who has hurt us.

It felt a bit like walking across a minefield as I prepared and led the service, wanting to encourage people to see themselves as having the potential to hurt others, even with the best of intentions, and to remember times of not being treated well. I just watched an online episode of See Hear Love about kindness as a fruit of the Spirit, and a researcher who was interviewed about her work on kindness said that we all assume that we are kind, and that it’s others who need to change their ways.

In my sermon I acknowledged that I had complained along with classmates in my undergrad courses about First Nations students getting free tuition, and how they asked odd questions and didn’t really belong. Someone was quite surprised that I would mention this publicly, but sadly it’s one of many times I’ve been unkind and perpetuated bad feelings, racism or stereotypes. My white privilege has come through in my words and actions at different times in my life. and recognizing it is the first step to change.

So what does reconciliation, that healing that allows for healthy and positive relations, look like? How do we go about it? The need for it with our First Nations people has been building for hundreds of years, and it will take a long time to untangle the harm done. As I preached I was acutely aware of some people with whom my relationship isn’t terrific. One of us is wounded (perhaps both), and we’re holding off addressing it, avoiding the vulnerability of that and potential for it to get worse before it gets better.

I was inspired by Luke’s story of breakfast on the beach where the risen Christ seeks out Peter and some of the other disciples. Knowing Peter’s guilt and shame about denying Him three times and abandoning Him, Jesus comes to the water’s edge and gently offers a better way to fish, and then provides a meal, literally and figuratively setting the table for a healing conversation. Peter accepts the hospitality and realizes that Jesus still cares for him and isn’t angry. He is sad to be asked three times if he loves Jesus, but responds yes each time, and as Jesus asks him to do something significant, Peter realizes that he has been forgiven, that he is still needed, and he is pulled out of the darkness of his grief and guilt.

I think our own reconciliation with God looks a bit like that - Jesus coming to gently call out to us from the edges to encourage us to choose a better way that will make our lives more full; Jesus feeding us somehow and offering the intimacy of hospitality, perhaps through another person or an experience of the divine; Jesus gently acknowledging our brokenness but still inviting us to be partners in healing the world.

And I think our reconciliation with others should also look a bit like this - gentle and well thought out words said sensitively and at the right time, hospitality communicating that the relationship is more important than our pride or ego, positive messages of hope while not negating the issues and problems that exist, powerful welcome and care that expresses love and support.

We are called to be reconcilers and to carry out the act of reconciliation with Jesus as our model, the One who reconciled us to God. This work takes patience, depth of compassion, courage, vulnerability and commitment to the welfare of the other as well as self-care. It is important work - just imagine if this conversation between Peter and Jesus had never taken place how much of the book of Acts might have never happened, and how Peter might have never felt worthy to play a role in the birth of the Church.

May we have confidence in our own healed relationship with God through Christ, and may that motivate us to do the work of reconciliation with others, for the glory of God.