Slowing Down and Noticing

I was forced to slow down when I was temporarily laid off from my other job in January. I wasn’t terribly happy about it at the time, but now thank God that I had that respite to recover from December and to start preparing for Lent. The weeks let me take in some con ed and do some apartment organizing, purging and cleaning. I even read a few books.

The slowing down also helped me to notice some patterns in myself and my ministry, habits I liked and some that I didn’t. I also reflected on the relationships I have with people in the congregation where I lead worship and do some pastoral care. There have definitely been some silver linings with the pandemic, the whole reason I was asked to do pastoral care in the first place.

When I began preaching there just over a year ago, there was a sea of faces greeting me. My previous church had 60-65 on a good day. At my current church, the church where I grew up and where I knew the names of most people but often little more, a good day was 125-150. Quite a difference, and a whole bunch of new faces since I was actively involved Sunday to Sunday. I remember looking out and trying to not feel overwhelmed at such a larger crowd than I’d become used to.

It turns out the pandemic has been wonderful for me getting to know the congregation. The restrictions have meant that I can’t/shouldn’t do home visits or go to the hospital or nursing homes. That suits me fine as I don’t drive. Instead, my love of the phone has been a gift. I can call one person then quickly move on to someone else with no time lost for travel or expectation of someone ‘hosting’ me and providing something and possibly awkward tea situations (which I don’t drink - yes, I’m strange).

Just talking to someone on the phone takes the pressure off both of us - we come just as we are without pretense, we remain safe, and we can end the call when either of us needs. Weather doesn’t impact us and it’s easy to find another time if needed or to leave a message. These conversations, without the imposition of hosting, have covered a lot of territory. I’ve been privileged over the last year to get to know many people so much better than I ever could have in the few minutes before people spring loose after church or with brief check-ins at monthly coffee hours, trying to catch one household after another after another. Whenever we do gather in person again, I will look out on a group of people I feel that I actually know.

I’m not saying pastoral care has been easy. People losing loved ones and unable to go to funerals or to gather or ritualize their loss has been difficult for many. Chronic illnesses leading to hospitalization and worse have been tough. Much has been hit and miss in this time of not seeing each other as I’ve tried to find the best way to communicate - skype with a family from a different culture, texting with some or messaging through facebook or e-mail. Different people at different times have preferred one or another form of communication. Flexibility and creativity has been key.

All of this connection has helped me to notice the beauty of people’s stories and faith journeys, of what they’ve overcome, the difference their attitudes and approaches to life have made, the appreciation they have for the church and the gifts of people in the congregation. I have been so blessed by listening and offering to pray and to have the prayer link activated for needs. I’m so privileged.

This has given me rich perspective about the things I’m struggling with or worried about. I’ve been able to see more clearly God’s presence in other people’s lives and my own. The investment in time has been so worth it for me to have a window into how people are really coping and what their needs are. Am I happy we’re in a pandemic? No, but I’m able to recognize that there have been many gifts within the crisis. I’ve learned how to be a better listener and I’ve been reminded of the uniqueness and beauty of every life.

During this season of Lent, I pray that we I can continue to slow down, despite my work resuming, and that I can continue to notice things that God is pointing out to me in my own life and the lives of others around me. Most importantly I hope that I can see Jesus’ footprints walking alongside me, urging me to keep going even as the cross looms ahead of us.